Aggies in the Cotton Bowl!!!

Get excited!!! Kevin's Dad just offered to buy him and I tickets to the game. Guess who is SOOOOOOO EXCITEDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!! this kid. right here. Go Ags! BTHO whoever we re playing!!!!!!!!!!

Thanksgiving with No Family

The holiday hit me a little harder than I thought it would, as it was the first time I was not able to make it home for any piece of the break...wait, break? What am I saying? I didn't have any sort of break, actually, because I worked Thursday(yeah, that's right, Thursday. Its bullshit, I know.), Friday, Saturday and Sunday...and also Monday, but that isn't here yet.

Anyways, having to work over a holiday made me more determined then ever to not be in the same place I am now next year. I love my family way to much to be away from them like this again.

There were two things to be Thankful for though.

1st: Kevin and I have officially been dating a year, on Thanksgiving Day. And I love him more then ever. I was, and still am, sad I was not able to go and see him and his family on Thursday, but, since I can't go home for Christmas Day, they have so graciously invited me to their house, and I am so greatful for that.

2nd: Good friends which turned a crappy holiday into a better one with a wonderful dinner which finished cooking at 11:30pm and an epic game of Cranium lasting well into the night. Thanks Christina, Jentri, Jauron and Aaron. It may have been a late dinner, but, damn it, we had a Thanksgiving!

All Work...and No Play.

Okay, first off, I admit to neglecting this blog for over a month. I believe the last thing I posted was about having the Pre-K teaching job....EPIC DISASTER! But, I made it through and survived to tell the tale, get paid, and never look back. Lesson learned, I am not made to work with kids under the age of 4.

Luckily, My old Assistant Manager from American Eagle called me while I was doing the subbing job and offered my a pretty sweet position at Gander Mountain. By the end of the week I was hired and have been working like CRAZY ever since. Its a great job and I am still able to take subbing positions on my days off, which is nice, but for the most part I'm working full time at Gander. Its really laid back and the other employees are a lot of fun to be around.

Kevin got his Aggie Bling on September 17th. His family came in and he did his ring dunk that night with 5 of our other friends. It was an amazing time. I love spending time with his family, and I felt lucky to have been able to spend such a special occasion with them. Football and Bonfire also started that weekend. So, in the end, the weekend was quite an event.
Since then, Football has fallen to pieces. And for something I have loved so much for years now, Bonfire has been sitting heavy on my heart with how pathetic our dorm's turnout has been so far. No one talks about it, but everyone who has been around for awhile is thinking the same thing, and its hard to watch the years of hard work disintegrate in front of our eyes.

On to happier things. Kevin and I went to a wedding this past weekend in Houston. He was a groomsman for an old HS buddy. We had a good time, despite the wedding being 'dry,' but it was nice being able to put faces with some of the names I always hear. Kevin's friend, Mike, is always fun to be around and we hung out quite a bit while Kevin was off doing groomsman stuff. As usual though, I took some pictures, but didn't get anything of myself. Go figure.
That sums everything up though. I'll try to keep up with things at least for a little while.

Teaching

I finally got my first Subing job! I will be TAing in a Pre-K class for this entire week. I'm so excited..and nervous. I'm pretty sure I didn't sleep at all, hence this is being written at 5am.

I am really happy that this will be my introduction to Subing though. Having the chance to, more or less, shadow a teacher for my first week will be so helpful, rather than being shoved into a classroom with 25 kids and no clue on what to do with them.

It also makes me happy that this is a job for an entire week, which is something that I really needed after feeling so worthless lately.

Texas A&M Honors the Past

At every football game, Texas A&M does a short segment called "Bugle Call" for former Ags who are truly incredible and inspiring. All of them are touching and give you chills, but this one is absolutely amazing and is the closest I have ever been to crying at a football game.


http://www.aggieathletics.com/allaccess/?media=192628

I couldn't get the video directly on here, but here is the link to it. A stadium of 81,287, record attendance for a season opener, gave Mr. Terrill a standing ovation. What a moment.

Move In Weekend...

Move-In weekend has its pros and cons. For instance,

Pro: Friends finally return and we all get to hang out and have a great time.

Con: Do parents and freshman even know how to drive??? How did these people get drivers licences????

Pro: Gig 'Em Week. A time to get to know the new freshman and break them into the college life.

Con: Dealing with freshman who don't know how to regulate themselves.

Pro: Businesses go back to normal hours...none of this closed for half the week and only open 2 days a week.

Con: Why are there SO MANY PEOPLE HERE!?!?!?

Ahhh...College Station. How I love thee.

Population on August 21st: 54,000
Population on August 22nd: 100,000+

And now the 'real' people will be hiding out again until May 15th.

Finding the Passion...again...

I used to have such a drive and a will to succeed. I used to know exactly what I wanted to do with my life. In the last 3 years, all of the passion I once had has completely disappeared. I'm not sure for the exact reason, whether it was the difficulty of finishing up school or the daunting task of taking on more. It could have been the amount of time I was away from the medical aspect of animals, but submerged in the management of horses in which I ended up hating.

Knowing I screwed up in college and I would have to get a Masters before I even thought about applying to Vet school is beyond what my brain can take right now, and THAT is overly depressing.

What happened to me???

I love to teach, and the more I think about it, the more I believe that a classroom is where I would like to end up, but is this a cop-out? Am I leaning on teaching because I can't mentally take going further in school? Maybe it's due to the fear of failing more than I already have..kind of a stop while I'm ahead reaction...but am I even 'ahead' at this point...not really.

When I write out my options, it seems silly to ask which is better. Of course I should give my original passion another chance to be re-ignited and immerse myself back into a veterinary setting and remind myself why I wanted to pursue it in the first place. Or should I try to start establishing myself as a teacher somewhere and just let it go.

I never excelled at the hard sciences when I got to A&M. I failed and I failed and I failed some more, and if that wasn't enough I failed again. Have I had enough signs already? Or was I just not focused and burnt out? But, Is it really worth paying for more school to find out?

I'm really trying to stay in good spirits, pretend like everything is okay, pretend like I have my life together. I have a strong personality, but this is slowly wearing it down.